Bankruptcy creditors are NOT just nameless, faceless big corporations that write off bad debt and go back to business as usual. What happens to personal responsibility when a creditor is a normal person who loses his children’s college education money by trying to help people who file bankruptcy?
In the forums the other day, I received the following question from a member about bankruptcy and getting hired after filing bankruptcy:
I didn’t expect to answer as I did. I thought it would be a quick response, until this question stirred up painful (personal) memories.
I certainly ever expected to share something personal with you…something so personal it has challenged my faith in other people.
Click ‘read more’ below for personal IRRESPONSIBILITY at its worst.
WHAT IS PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY?
“Washtocal” is using the age-0ld argument claiming “everyone else is being bailed out….”
Reality Check: NOT everyone who owes money is discharging their debt obligation in bankruptcy.
It only appears that way.
YES, more and more employers are pulling credit before hiring. Whether financial services or janitorial positions, employers believe a person’s credit correlates with job performance.
Employers care about your credit!
Employers are rejecting applicants because of credit issues.
Right or wrong, employers legally and morally can reject applicants based on credit. They’re doing it, and there’s NOTHING you or I can do about it…even if we wanted to do something.
Therefore, bad credit will keep some people from getting hired or promoted.
Here’s where “washtocal’s” questions get personal and difficult for me.
Walking away from debt owed to a bank when short selling a house doesn’t bother me. walking away from debt owed to an individual (a real person with a real family) bothers me. In this case, you easily can call me a hypocrite.
Bankruptcy hurts the little guy too….
Here’s why this topic is so personal to me. For 16 years I was a high school teach and coach. You may or may not know this, but teachers do not make much money.
My wife and I lived well below our means, so we could save money to pay for our kids’ college.
With this money, I made some of the most stupid mistakes a person EVER could make and now my wife and kids are paying the price for my stupidity.
You see, I once BELIEVED in people. I believed in helping people. And I thought I *knew* people.
Clearly, as you will see, I underestimated the greed and selfishness of people I tried to help.
I put my kids’ college on the line, when I helped several families rent-to-own their new homes. I thought these were honorable people who NEVER would walk away from their debt obligation. Even more painful, these were not strangers. I *thought* they were FRIENDS.
I want you to see how stupid I could be, believing “friends” would not “SCREW” a friend. As you’re reading this, you can’t help but see WHY employers must consider credit in the hiring process.
If someone will “screw” a friend, what will that person do to his/her employer…the faceless, nameless employer?
Trust (is) a 4-letter word
I trusted these people and they turned their backs on me when it benefited them:
- Kevin Inman & Daphne Lash of Parrish, FL, discharged $68,000, without so much as an apology for STEALING money my wife and I had put away for our kids’ college. I thought Kevin & Daphne were friends. I trusted them. I stupidly used my kids’ college money to help Kevin and Daphne get the home they wanted (and could afford). I trusted them. When it came time for them to get their own mortgage, they were short on money. I didn’t hesitate to agree to carry a second mortgage: $68,000 (+/- a couple $1,000). How did they repay my trust? They filed BANKRUPTCY. No apology. No promise repay the money even at $20.00 a week. NOTHING! Gone: $68,000.
- Julio & Nancy Compre of Davenport, FL, disappeared, owing me something like $6,700 in a signed Promissory Note after I helped them relocate to Florida from New York. I helped them rent-to-own their home and stepped out of my comfort zone to help them. Once again, I watched people I trusted walk away from their obligation. Gone: $6,700
- William Keim & Sherry Keim of Fort Myers, FL, needed me to help them rent-to-own their home. When they did nothing during the 14 months to improve their credit, I stupidly did NOT kick them (and their children) out of the house as a real business man would have done. In return, they trashed (and I mean they TRASHED the house in a disgusting manner) the house and disappeared. I lost over $25,000 + the house to short sale (at least it wasn’t lost to foreclosure). You see, this is what I get for trying to help people. Gone: $25,000
- Brian Copeland and Kendria Gardner of Fort Myers, FL, rented to own a home in the same neighborhood as the Keims at the same time. Guess what? They too stole off in the middle of the night, forcing the house into foreclosure. Copeland did nothing to improve his credit during the lease term. As I did with the Keims, I stupidly extended the lease term. When I didn’t receive the May rent, I drove to the house to find out why they weren’t answering my calls. You might not believe this (I certainly didn’t want to believe it either) but they had moved out of my house and into the house next door. Un-frickin-be-liev-able! How much loss? I lost over $25,000 + the house to short sale as well. Gone: $25,000
- Sarasota attorney David Rosenberg (who had handled some real estate closings for me) called me one night at home asking for help. Turns out, one of David’s childhood friends was in a difficult position and needed $6,000. On David’s word for a childhood friend, I agreed to lend this money to Steven Phillips of Sarasota. Secured by a mortgage to Steven and Carmen Phillips’ Sarasota home, the money should have been safe…right? I thought this was a safe, easy investment to help David’s friend. Once again, I screwed up. I trusted people to do what’s right. Steven Phillips made one or two payments to pay me back and then stopped paying. When I began calling Attorney David Rosenberg about his childhood friend, David pretended it was my problem…that he had nothing to do with the Phillips not paying me back. The Phillips, who also had stopped paying their house payment, have lost their house to foreclosure. Gone: $6,000
The bottom line is that (I) screwed up. I NEVER should have gambled with my money put away for my kids’ college or our retirement. I blame myself for trusting and believing in people.
What I discovered with these painful experiences I will face for the rest of my life is NOT to gamble on people. It appears to me, most people don’t give a damn about the other guy. It’s all about THEM.
Back to your example, “Washtocal,” yes, the FAT CATS happily walk away with their billions when they run their businesses into the ground, losing retirees’ retirement money!
No indictment.
No public humiliation and restitution.
So there it is: Kevin & Daphne “write my kids and me off” in bankruptcy. No blood; no foul.
For me, I never will be allowed to forget my stupidity…that is, my desire to help and trust people. If I had wanted to help, I should have gambled with money I could lose and still sleep at night.
If bankruptcy is the solution after considering all other options, then move ahead with it and let the chips fall where they may. But please, pay back the people whom you know you should pay back.
I sincerely believe your friend’s bankruptcy can be logically explained to a future employer when it comes up. In the meantime, I am trying survive the sinking Titanic.
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